LIMERIX™ V1

An ex-Presidente named Trump
one morning was taking a dump.
He gave a big squeeze
as he started to sneeze,
and his toupee plopped into the sump.

OK…I guess it’s not really a toupee…which is fucking incredible…so shoot me.
By the way…in a completely unrelated line of inquiry…I know he gets a Secret Service detail for the rest of his life.
Does his hair get one too?

I was scared about Covid19
until they produced the vaccine.
We should trust the FDA.
At least, that’s what they say…
till we all start to look like The Spleen

If you don’t understand or appreciate the reference, look it the fuck up!
And, if you don’t…you should be ashamed of yourself. I’ll give you a hint…it’s pronounced SHLPLEEN.

An old politician named Rudy
had a definite taste for young booty.
He took off his pants
for some steamy romance
but his penis just would not salute-y.

Of course, I am definitely not referring to THAT Rudy…any resemblance or similarity
to persons living or dead or decrepit was probably not intentional and should be completely ignored.

I think recycling’s a gaffe,
so much so that it makes me laugh.
The materials tossed
save no whales, trees or cost.
It’s like making your bread out of chaff.

So…many of you are undoubtedly asking, “What in the hell is chaff?”
The answer is simple…it’s the inedible husk of a stalk of wheat. In reality, it’s actually far more useful than recycled
plastic and paper since it is actually used for feeding livestock. Maybe we should start eating bottlecaps…

A suicide bomber named Zed
was challenged to get out of bed.
Kept hitting the snooze
and forgetting the fuse
and only blew off his own head.

Hey! Highly trained terrorists are people too! They make mistakes just like everybody else.
Who are we to judge?

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